The Writing Life

I'm currently into my second week of what I call "The Writing Life." Although technically I suppose it's my first week since I spent three days of last week on vacation.

The writing life looks like something I always wished I'd had. I get up in the morning (sometimes very slowly depending on how I'm feeling that day) and I make my breakfast. I clean the kitchen, take care of my morning chores, and maybe watch thirty minutes of television while I finish eating or as a transition into my day.

Then I pull out my computer and I write something. Today, I finished the final edits on an essay about motherhood that I'd worked on last week. Before that, it was writing essays for my book manuscript that is almost coming to a close.

Once I've done my writing work I rest a bit, or do some chores, or run some errands, or poke around on social media in my support group, or check the news. In the afternoon I write some more if I'm feeling ok, or I rest if I'm not. Maybe I watch a little more television or maybe I don't. Maybe I run some more errands or maybe I don't. And then I start getting ready to cook dinner.

I love my current life because I get to work on the stuff I want to work on (instead of stuff I hate doing every day), I have very low daily stress (except when I worry about how/when I'll find another job), and I get to rest as much as is required (without having to check my emails constantly to make sure nobody is looking for me). It's a life I could get used to and relax into forever but, unfortunately, that I can't stay in for too long. I don't want to be a total shit of a wife and put that type of burden on my husband.

But I do hope to create this life again for myself someday, and I think the only way I could get there is to write something that is successful and that gets people to notice me. And this requires putting my work out there and getting things done. So the focus of my time during this medical sabbatical, when I'm not resting and otherwise trying to survive, is on getting things written and ready for publication. Every single day.

I don't pretend that the path I dream of following is easy, because it isn't and most people don't achieve it at all. But what I do know is that it feels good and it makes me happy, and it sits perfectly with my soul. I was reading an article in a magazine last night about how we should really pay attention to the things we do. Does it feel good? Does it give us peace? Does it create happiness? If so do it because it's your life purpose.

Ok, I'm doing it. But I'm leaving it up to whomever is in charge of this universe to get me to where I'm supposed to go. My job is to write and to get things done. I have to strive, I have to try, I have to put my whole heart into it because none of this is going to happen with crossed fingers and silent prayers.