I dreamt of writing novels

So for a long while now, probably a decade, I've thought about how my dream is to write books.  It's funny what I see in my head.  I see myself spending hours laboring over something I love, looking out the window, petting my cats.  Out of the corporate spotlight.

As much as I've desired to write books over the years, I've always felt a block standing in my way.  Not really a block, but more like a three foot thick concrete wall that shoots out of the ground and up into the sky.  Can't go over it, can't crawl under it, can't go around it.  Sort of like the Berlin wall, but my own personal prison.

I'm not sure why this is or what the problem is.  But as I mentioned in my first post on this blog, I think I just don't know what to write about.  The writing ability is on this side of the wall, but the creativity and ideas are on the other side.   And for some reason I can't merge the two.

If I stop and really think about my life, I do still have these idealistic dreams of being a great writer.  Publishing not one but many books, some receiving acclaim.  A few affecting people in a positive way.

Me making my mark on history and leaving a piece of myself to humanity.  Just as my favorite authors have done through their storytelling.

So I guess I need to hang on to that dream.  But I do need to figure out what I'll write about.  I need to find a topic close to my heart that will hold my interest, and that makes the words flow out of my fingers and onto the screen in an almost blind way, my brainwaves flatlined as the text creates itself.

It's a dream, and I hope I get there.  We'll see where I go from here.

So I started another blog

I'm giving myself less than 10 minutes to write this first post.  Because it's late and I'm tired!  But since I created this blog today, I figured I'd better make my first post.

I started this blog at the suggestion of a writer friend who, when I complained of writer's block, said I should start a blog about it.  So I guess what I'm going to do is just write about my struggles as a writer.  My chief problems being a lack of confidence in my artistic creativity, and a feeling of despair that I will never write anything worth publishing.

It's silly really, because mechanically I'm really a good writer.  I know I can write.  But the problem is, I don't often know what to write about.  Unless it just comes to me, sort of like right now.

I think if I just knew what to write about then I could spit out books so fast, that I'd be one of those people that get designated as "prolific writers".  That would be cool.  So I'm thinking since I attempted a fiction novel and failed there, I've got to remind myself that I failed because I didn't know what I was writing about.

The moral of this tangent is...if I'm going to write, I better write non-fiction or I better have some sort of outline for any fiction I might do.

But more on that later.

It's been about five minutes, and I think I've written enough for now.  Hey, it's a start.